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Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Eye in the sky...

The Alan Parsons Project- Eye in the Sky Album:Eye in the Sky (1982)

 One day at work someone asked me if I had a band aid because first I am an eagle scout and they always test me to see if I am prepared and second because I am the diabetic that carries a purse full of drugs and drug paraphernalia.  It took me a bit but I did finally find my band aids and they were happy to have something to cover their paper cut.  While I was going through my hoarders episode of medical crap collectors I came across a small bottle of eye drops and that got me thinking of why I keep eye drops with me.
 If you know anything about me you know that all the luck I have is bad luck and recently I not only scratched 85% of the skin thingy on my eye but I decided to do it again while getting my rock climbing and rappelling instructor certification.  Since those two life changing events (OK maybe eye changing events) I now carry eye drops in my pump supply purse (which fits in my larger purse) and also a bottle in my truck and another bottle at my house.  The reason for all this is for all you out there that have never had a piece of dirt in your eye or never poked it with a stick or even just had an eye irritation but ANYTHING IN YOUR EYE HURTS LIKE HELL!!!  This is just a secret hint for all you out there that have a standard first aid kit and have not modified it to work in a diabetics life.  This is one of those things I keep in my hoarders episode of medical crap collectors bag, because being out in the woods or further than 30 miles from a walmart and to get something simple in your eye and having to try to wash it out with your wonderful iodine laden swamp water is not going to work that well or what most people do is just rub it till the whole lens is scratched and you still have the crap in your eye so just having a simple thing of natural tears goes along way and weighs nothing in your first aid kit.  I would also say a safety pin should be with this and also dental floss or one of those plucker's things.  These are all around our houses but in nature there is no safety pin trees or dental floss grass for when yo get turkey jerky lodges so deep in your gums it feels like you would almost pull your teeth out to get it.  Trust me you will thank me later for this advice.
 OK, here is something I saw last Friday as I left work and headed to Kohl's to get some underwear with my 10 dollar off coupon.  I have seen some dumb things people do with their cars, but this is probably one of the most stupid I have seen in a longtime.  What car needs a mustache on the hood?  Yeah that is right, none!  This person probably paid 60 bucks for this thinking they were cute and now their car is the laughing stock of the parking lot.
I can just imagine when they take this car into the dealership to trade it in for some sort of upgrade and they want more money because all the money you put into it like a stupid mustache.  Would you list this on the eBay motors posting?  Nice KIA with low miles green metallic in color and comes with the optional mustache on the hood.  Simply ridiculous but it stopped me and I am putting it on my blog.  Someone was telling me that they saw a Volkswagen bug with eye lashes on the headlights.  I would put that in the same category as a mustache on the car department which is the "How can I get people to make fun of me while I lower the value of my car at the same time" category.

5 comments:

  1. Hi there,

    I found your blog because I am trying to figure out how to go camping in a region that may have bears (so that you have to put all food into a bear box) if you are diabetic. It seems impossible since you wouldn't be able to have food on hand for lows in the night. Any tips for this? Thanks!

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  2. You always make me laugh, out loud. Like nobody else!
    "one of those plucker things" you mean... tweezers? and I'm happy to say I always have eye drops in my camping first aid kit too. I learned my lesson the hard way once myself.
    and the car stache? WTF?! I'm not sure what I laughed at more. the picture or your explanation! its not even 6am.

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  3. Princess in Boots,

    I am in Texas so I do not come across bear country very often. What I would do is get some "insta-glucose" since it is sealed in a plastic bottle and then get a small hardcase otterbox to store them while you sleep. Then just to be over the top safe I would put each tube in a ziplock bag and maybe spray everything with some hunters scent eliminator which you can get in wipes so each night you can wipe everything down and sleep safely or until the bears eat you. email me and I can give you a few other things I have done with racoons. email: davehennesey@hotmail.com

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  4. Hey Dave,

    This is a great start, thanks! I had not heard of "otterboxes" and scent eliminator. I've written to you at your address.

    P. in Boots

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  5. HAHA your entry reminds me of when people put those fake wind up cranks on the top of their cars. I enjoyed your sincere disgust coming through your post. You crack me up.

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