It puts the lotion on it's skin!

People say I have an over active imagination.  I wouldn't say it is over active as much as it is fast and descriptive.  I saw this commercial the other day selling gold bond ultimate for diabetics.  That got me thinking about what they put in this stuff or take out of this stuff to make it for diabetics.  Did they remove the high fructose corn syrup found in most bottles of lotion?  did they put some cinnamon in it to cure us?  We will never know what they did to make this lotion for diabetics.

Then I see at the bottom of the bottle that nine out of ten diabetics saw a noticeable skin improvement in one hour.  I then was thinking about that and they are saying that one person didn't even realize they had lotion on their hands?  I am not sure this stuff is that good if one out of every ten diabetics are walking around with globs of lotion on their hands because they can't feel it.

 

Finally I had the perfect image of what this lotion is for.  Remember the movie "Silence of the Lambs?"  This lotion is for the part where Buffalo Bob catches a diabetic and puts them in his pit to shrink them and make a baseball cap out of their right buttock.  So my mind was doing all sorts of things like having the diabetic in the pit yell at Buffalo Bob that they have to get their 10:30am 15 gram snack in before they can take their Lantis, and how the diabetic in the pit asks to see the nutrition label for the chicken he gives them to feed.  OK, so I guess I do have a bit of an imagination but it is so much fun with diabetes on TV all the time.

 



Good Advice

My good buddy Vic told me a while back that he likes to take his bike in every now and then when he feels like he lost some speed or that it just doesn't feel right.  You know that feeling when you sit on the smallest seat you can stand for seven hours and it starts to kind of hurt?  Cyclists are so weird, but it is true that once you are comfortable with cycling you start trying to get everything as small as possible.  I bought my recent bike like six months or so ago and it felt great except I kept having funny soreness in my legs, back, and arms.  So I moved my seat a little up and down and all around but it just moved the discomfort from one place to another and after three hours on my bike I felt like it was the last thing I wanted to be on because I was bored and just didn't feel good on it.  These are not good things to be feeling with a new bike so I took Vic's advice and went into my local tri shop and had them do an eyeball adjustment (tri shops charge alot for everything so I was hoping to pay the least and get the most from them).  The before picture is on top and you can see that I was sitting like a complete dork on my bike.  Putting all sorts of weight on my arms, my back was compensating for my handlebars being in the wrong spot and my legs were not extending properly.  The bottom picture is what I looked like after (yeah still a complete dork but in proper form) flipping the handlebar neck over, the seat being raised, and my seat being shifted slightly rearward and tilted forward.  The bike feels so freakin awesome now and I would recommend this procedure to anyone.  Sure we all know how to twist this, turn that but to have someone else watch you is like night and day.  I now feel like I can sit on that itty-bitty seat forever and still pedal till my hearts content.  Then talking to the tri shop pro, he gave me all sorts of little tips to make my rides even better.  I would have never been willing to pay for this work in the first place and then even to know to get it done if it were for listening to the good advice from Vic.

It happened to me!

I have heard of this happening to other people but never did I think it would happen to me.  The dreaded tubing tear.  I was in my truck the other day and unbuckled my seat belt when in a thrust of me trying to get out to stand in line at Subway for some eat fresh dinner I heard my insulin pump hit the floor of the truck.  I looked down and was quite perplexed by this because I have a long tube (not that tube, my tubing from my site to my pump is like a 30 inch length or something) but not long enough for my pump to hit the floor.  I looked down and saw that the tubing had torn right out of the connection to the top of the thing-a-ma-bob.  You are all impressed with my technical lingo aren't you?

 

The good thing with modern science and stuff is that we have a way to combat issues like this.  Now when I get my pump supplies each part is individually wrapped like the infusion site, the tubing, and the cartridge.  So I did what my buddy Steve taught me over the summer to do, and that was not to waste my primed cartridge and pump site but to just replace the tubing and go along my merry way.  With that knowledge in hand I fixed my issue and was munching of a fresh sub in no time.  Now for the legal mumbo jumbo: do not ever do this, if you read a recommendation from my website that saves time, money, or anything do not do it because you can sue me if it does not cure your diabetes.  I am not a professional of any medical designation, heck I couldn't even pull off dressing like a wizard if I had too.  So this is for entertainment purposes only and the blog is intended to show you cool stuff I do because I don't sue people.

Saturday night Diabetes!

 

Even though Saturday Night Live is just a shell of it's former glory days they do still have some pretty funny skits.  A while back they did a spoof on the Walking Dead AMC TV show that was really good.  I love the back and forth with the zombie racist bits and at the end they throw in some quality diabetes comedy that kills me every time I see it.  I don't know if it is bad of me to enjoy diabetes humor or not, but I do.  Is that bad for me to admit?  Should I be more straight faced and professional with my disease or is enjoying the few things we get to enjoy because of this disease good enough?  Have a look at the SNL skit in the link above and I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Winter

So I must apologize for being gone for a bit.  I had some computer issues plus my job had me tied up, but here I am and still diabetic as ever.  People say I am like an old man that has bad jokes, passes alot of gas, and complains alot.  They are probably right on all those points but those aren't all my downsides.  Living in the Dallas area is great for those of us that do not like much of a winter and summers that are blasting hot.  This year was much different though as all of you are probably familiar with the Siamese polar vortex winter bears or whatever that thing is.  All I know is winter was rough for me (yes that is a complaint not a fact).  The winter brings massive dry skin, sickness, and the dark.  I would say the winter is my reminder (I like our short one week winters the best in Dallas) that in late August when we are counting the days of 100 plus degree hot days that I need to enjoy how my tanned moist skin feels, how I haven't been sick in a long time, and how the days are light all the time.  You wake up with light, get off work in light, and heck even go to bed and the sun sometimes is still up.

 

 

Then this week my bulbs came up (it is still cold in this town) and reminded me that the end of the Siamese polar vortex winter bears is near.  The time change is around the corner and all the runners, cyclists, and dogs are gearing up to have some fun.  So the next time something brings you down like what a cold Siamese polar vortex winter bears does to me don't think about the downside to it all.  Think about how there is so much upside in the other three seasons.  I think that is like glass half full stuff but proper winter work brings excellent summer results as my fitness instructors tell me.  This year has been bad but that just gave me more reason to do more workouts and focus on how awesome I am going to be once I can stop wearing a huge yak haired coat and Eskimo mittens all the time.